"We've got a lovely solution to
'Kingdom O' Magic'
and you haven't!"

(One Of the Giant Spiders from Backwood)

General Information

This was written after having seen the rather poor and often inaccurate hints from some guy calling himself "Darksheer" .Apparently, he didn't like the game so he got really sloppy.

He also only covered one quest, claiming that the others were too boring to comment. In his walkthrough, he eventually mixes up all three quests and even gave some hints which were just plain wrong.

This solution covers all three quests!

Some minor aspects may be different when playing with Thidney, I played in Sha-ron Mode.

"How do I work this?"

I tried to keep this as fair as possible. The text is divided in locations where you get basic hints first ("You need:" and "You get:").

The solution is mostly given in a Q&A style, so you can first read the question, think about it and then proceed with the answer if you want to.

Often, you will only want a very basic hint to avoid spoiling the fun o' exploring the Kingdom by yourself.

After the solve, you will find information about the people you meet while walking around the kingdom, followed by Miscellaneous hints.

At the end o' this file, you can find a rough listing o' how to finish the quests. This is general information in case you don't know where you are supposed to be going. There be spoilers here, so beware!!!

Since the names o' the quests are a bit long to type out, the following abbreviations have been used:

The Good Old Traditional Quest (GOTQ)
The Magnificent 7-11 Quest (M711Q)
The Bizarre & Slightly Twisted Quest (B&STQ)

If you spot a parenthesis with the word (day) or (night) in it, it means that this place can only be sensibly visited during that particular time o' day.

Important Information

The best way to use this solve is probably to print it out and cover the pages with another blank page. Peek only when and where you must.

This is not an official document. It was written for fun. It may not be entirely accurate and it may not be entirely complete.

Send your comments to [email protected]; send your flames to >NUL. If this solve spoils your fun with the game: not my problem.

Legalese

I am in no way associated with SCI, its international distributors or the Dark Lord himself. This document may be only freely distributed online, and on the following networks: Internet, FidoNet and America Online.

It may not (repeat: MAY NOT) be distributed outside those channels. You may print it out for personal reference, but you may not, at any point, charge money for it.

Flake Town

You should definitely always start out in Flaketown to get your first experiences with the Interface and how to deal / talk with other characters.

Wig Shop (day)

You need: Hair
You get: Wig, Sign

Is it open? Get the cheap wig. Do you have some spare hair? Give it to him and get the sign.

Hair dresser (day)

You need: Wig, Sheep
You get: Hairspray, wool

Don't visit him without a wig in your inventory. Is it open? Get the brochure on the counter. Wear a wig before talking to him.

Is there hair on the floor? Get it and deliver it to the Wig-Meister.

Do you have a sheep? Have it shorn here.

Tavern

You need: Sign
You get: Lighter

Do you have a sign from the Wig-Meister? Trade it for a lighter. Is there a parrot? Use a sack on him.

Is someone in the toilet? Give him toilet paper.

Are you playing M711Q? Look behind the innkeeper: There is a back room.

Granny (day)

You need: Wool
You get: Child

Is she there? Be evil to her and use the word "tea" .Grab the child. Do you have wool? Give it to Granny.

Ferryman

You need: Money, Parrot
You get: Ride in ferry

Do you have a parrot? Give it to the ferryman.

Costume Shop (day)

You need: Money
You get: Costume

Is it open? Get the disco threads.

Disco (night)

You need: Costume
You get: Necklace / Golden Boots, Sack

Is there a sack next to the back door? Get it. Do you have disco wear? Put it on and enter.

Talk to the disco king and get his necklace. Use the necklace in the disco to get golden boots.

Elfis Golem

You need: Microphone
You get: Plunger

Do you have a microphone? Talk to him. Get the plunger.

King Afro's Palace (day)

You need: Grail
You get: Toilet Paper

Is it open? Get your quest. The hippie woman can be killed. Do you have a grail? King Afro gives you toilet paper for it.

Police Officer (day)

You need: Donuts
You get: Sunglasses

Do you have donuts? Give them to him and get his mirrored sunglasses.

Baker's Island

You need: Caged Child, Jar o' lightning
You get: Donuts, Rope, Gingerbread Hero

Be sure to get the donuts. Do you have a caged child? Use it on the house. Inside, you find a plan and donuts.

Is there a water elemental next to the house (day)? Get him to turn the wheel.

Is there a mad baker inside? Get donuts from him. Use the secret plan on the baker.

Is there a rope on the wall? Get it.

Is there a cooking form in the back room? Use the rolling pin and the form on the dough on the counter.

Do you have a jar o' lightning? Open it outside o' the house.

Do you have a gingerbread hero? Put it on the ballows.

The Gorgon's Valley

You need: Sunglasses
You get: Axe, Sword O' Normalness, Paper Bag, Action Figure

Do not enter the cave without sunglasses. Does the statue have a book next to it? Get it.

Get the weapons outside o' the Gorgon's Cave.

When the Gorgon appears, wear sunglasses.

Inside the cape, get open the gas cooker and get the paper bag.

Dwarf's Mountain

You need: Stilt Plans, Goliath
You get: Asbestos Suit, Treasure

If you are playing GOTQ, absolutely do not enter the cave! Were you led by Goliath? Use Goliath on the Dwarf Head Key.

Is there a head dwarf at the front gate? Give him stilt plans. Get the armor and the treasure from inside the cave.

Backwoods

You need: Hairspray, Lighter, Book O' Knots
You get: Card, Instructions, Telephone, Spell, Cow

Look at the instructions, look at the shoes, get the telephone (you can get hints from it). There is a spell on a sign next to the bridge.

Do you have a Book O' Knots? Use it with the web on the tree.

Do you have hairspray and a lighter? Use lighter with hairspray. Use the flamethrower against the spiders. Pick them up.

Dark Tower

You need: Hamster, Empty Donut Box
You get: Palentire Stone

Do you have a hamster? Use it on the door. Go up the stairs. Put the Palantire Stone inside the empty donut box. Always put the stone back into the box after using it.

De-Lorean

Leafy Glade

You get: Tubbaware

Are there little guys? Announce to stomp on them (talking), stomp on them in quick succession and get the Tubbaware. This is not easy, save before trying.

Royal Clearing

You need: Ice, Mirror, Visitor's Book
You get: Wrench, Toilet Cleaner, Spell

Talk to king before getting the ice. Never take a thermal detonator, but do threaten with having one.

Do you have ice? Give it to the king (hurry).

Do you have a mirror and a visitor's book? Use them on the queen. If you are good, you can get a protective spell and a toilet cleaner.

The Kalibre Pass (day)

You get: Ice

Get the ice (hidden in the middle o' the high point o' the pass) and hurry back to the king o' De-Lorean with it. If you've already done that, be sure to cross the pass quickly.

Do you have a plunger and a toilet cleaner? Use them on the very public toilet.

Top and Bottom O' The Falls

Top

You need: Cork, Duvet

Is there a barrel? Look at it. Do you have a cork? Use it with the barrel.

Do you have a duvet? Use it with the barrel.

Never enter a barrel which isn't corked and lined.

Bottom

You need: Tubbaware
You get: Grail

Get the grail. Do you have Tubbaware? Put grail in Tubbaware. Deliver grail to King Afro.

Eastwood

Is there anything happening there other than Ringwraith Mobbing?

If you're smart, you can avoid physical battle with most Ringwraiths by choosing your dialogue carefully. Sha-Ron is rather weak in physical battle.

The Great Western Road

You need: Crank Handle
You get: Crank Handle

Get crank handle from car. Use it on the ferry to get to Edam. Is there a sign on the pole next to the ferry? Look at it.

Troll Cave

You need: Brochure
You get: Spells, Invitation

During the day, the trolls usually are in the cave. It is better to attack them in the night, one by one. Spell O' Cabbage, followed quickly by a physical attack, worked best for me. Do you have a brochure from the hair dresser? Open it in front o' a troll.

If you use the brochure, you will not get the baseball bat.

There is a spell outside the cave. There is an invitation inside the cave.

Rivendull (day)

You need: Invitation, Cup, Gift Voucher
You get: Hamster

Do you have a wedding invitation and a cup from the burial chamber? Talk to the guard. Do you have an Elven Gift Voucher? Give it to the guard. Tell him to get rid o' a dragon.

Get hamster from Don Elrondo.

Never insult Don Elrondo. If you do, you will have to dispatch an Annoying Italian.

The Bearing Downs

You need: White Sheet
You get: Drugged Beef, Mallet, Cup

Talk to Timmy. Go to Edam Gates, go back to river, go back to Edam Gates, go back to Timmy. Is Timmy drugged? Get the drugged meat. In the right-hand burial chamber there is a mallet.

Do you have a white sheet? Wear it before visiting the burial chamber on the left. Get the cup.

Edam

You need: Drugged Meat
You get: Mirror, Visitor's Book, Cork, Duvet, White Sheet

Do you have drugged meat? Use it on the gate. Go to the tavern. Use the visitor's book.

Upstairs

You get: Mirror, Visitor's Book, Duvet, White Sheet

In the honeymoon suite, look at the bed. You will get a mirror. Is there a cat in the cupboard? Repeatedly apply a ten point spell on it (i.e. Whizbang).

Is there a duvet in the cupboard? Get it.

Is there a white sheet in the cupboard? Get it.

Cellar

You get: Cork

The cellar is hidden roughly in the middle o' the tavern. Is there a cork? Get it.

Moronica

You need: Rope
You get: Hay, Humphrey Balrog

Is there hay in one o' the caves? Get it. There is a toilet in the back o' the Tavern in the caves. Use plunger and toilet cleaner on it.

Is there a fire giant walking around the Cave with the chasm? Talk to him.

Do you have a rope? Tie rope to rock, use rock with Humphrey Balrog.

Sewer Lake

You need: Plunger, Toilet Cleaner
You get: safe passage

Do not try to fight the monster. Do you have toilet cleaner? Use it on the toilet in the tavern.

Do you have a card? Use it on the crack in the door.

Dimwit Dale

You need: Hay, Beans, Raisins
You get: Horsepoo, Beanstalk, Candle

Is there a horse outside? Give it hay. Do you have beans? Put them in the hay.

Is there a beanstalk? Climb up and enter the Giant castle.

Have you dispatched the spiders? Give them (as "raisins") to the giantess. Get giant candle.

Rhite-Gard

You need: Palentire Stone, Dead High Steward, Wrench
You get: Jar O' Lightning, Stilt Plans, Light Saber, Spells

Make sure the High Steward is dead and you have the Palentire Stone before going in. Kill the orcs. Step on one particular, unmarked stone in roughly the middle o' the room, next to the valve indicators.

Do you have the Palentire Stone? Use it (get it out o' the box first).

Do you have a wrench? Use it on the valve. Marshghast, the evil wizard, "gets it".

Put stone back in box. Go upstairs. Take the light sabre and the stilt plans.

Is there a jar o' lightning there? Get it.

Top O' Rhite-Gard Castle

You get: Beastie / Sheep

Go further upstairs. Go to the helipad. Is there a sheep? Get it.

Is there a caged beastie? Talk to it and let it out (If you are playing the M711Q, tell it to go to the Tavern).

In B&STQ, the beastie serves no purpose other than comic relief.

Minar Tragedy

You need: Sword O' Normalness
You get: Little Yellow Fellow, Orc Eye On A Stick

Get the orc eye at the gate. Do you have a Sword O' Normalness? Use it on the Ninja Baker's vat o' dough. Get loaf o' ninja bread.

In the tavern, talk to the Suspicious Fellow and play the game. Get a Little Yellow Fellow.

High Steward

You need: Ninja Bread, Action Figure, Paper Bag
You get: Dead High Steward, Small Key

Turn back if you have no ninja bread, paper bag or Kingdom O' Magic Action Figure. Talk to guards. In the castle, insult the High Steward.

Look at the remains (In B&STQ, he has a small key).

Put remains in paper bag, put action figure on throne.

The Palentire Stone works only after you have killed the High Steward.

Lift

You need: Small Key

Never press the "3" button. Do you have a small key? Use it on the keyhole beside the elevator.

Kori-Dor

You need: Orc Eye On A Stick
You get: Orc Disguise, Spells

Do not go in through the main entrance! Kill all enemies if possible. Go in by the back entrance. Get the spell o' Airstrike.

Do you have an orc eye on a stick? Use it on the eye scanner.

Get the orc disguise and wear it.

Ring the Dark Lord's bell three times.

Mt. Boom

You need: Asbestos Armor, Giant Candle

Do you have asbestos armor? Use it. Do you have the giant candle? Put it on the candle holder.

This is the end o' the B&STQ.

Meeting people

If you kill anyone, be sure to look at the tombstone. You will get their possessions. Before attacking someone, look at him or her. If the health points are not numerical, this person cannot be defeated in direct combat; you will have to find another way.

Elves

You need: Underwear
You get: Gift Voucher

Ringwraiths

You get: Money, Spells

Kill them all. If you don't want to do it yourself, wait until the Elves do it and collect the loot.

Pinhed

You get: Sword, Small Key

Kill him.

Pixie

Leave him alone.

Orks

You get: Money, Spells

Kill them, if possible.

Goliath

You need: Golden Shoes

Make him show you the back entrance to the Dwarf mountain or join the M711Q.

Jack

You need: Cow
You get: Beans

The cow is the one hanging in the spiders' web. You have to have a Book O' Knots to get it.

Terrence

You need: Little Yellow Fellow
You get: Microphone

He wants a friend. A little yellow fellow will do. Get a microphone from him.

Miscellaneous

The number o' parodies is innumerable. Check out the Nazi / Rob Schneider Wig-Meister, the Christopher Lloyd-like Mad Baker, Humphrey Balrog, the Ringwraiths... never mind Puff The Magic Dragon, Terrence, Pinhed or Conrad The Barbarian.

Tips for playing

The spell o' cabbage is good only if you immediately follow it up with a physical attack.

Hurry with that ice.

Sometimes, the tomb stone o' a dead character is only two pixels wide and tall. Clean your mouse before playing...

Ignore any stones lying around. There is only one significant stone in the game: the one in the Dark Tower.

Always save your game before important conversations or events. If you don't get a conversation to work the way it should, you can always go back to that very same point.

There are a lot o' red herrings: Things that can be done in one quest, but which cannot be completed in other quests.

You can get hints via the mobile phone: Call the actual hint line (see game manual) using the phone in the game! Every hint costs you a gold piece, though, and sometimes the hints are next to useless (The hotline number in the British Edition is: 0 1703 631 826).

Some fun things to try out

Generally speaking: It is often fun to get really insulting to see what happens.

Ask Elfis for a clue. Ask what you get for one gold piece or accept the price.

Ask the king o' De-Lorean about his tiger wife.

Be very offensive with the Queen o' De-Lorean.

Talk to one o' the elves about vandalism.

Make a really bad pun with Terrence and the Wig-Meister.

As Sha-ron, talk dirty to Terrence (or to anyone, really).

Try to get thrown into prison by the Cop.

Do try out the thermal detonator sometime. That's one way to finish the game VERY quickly.

Don't put the Palentire Stone back in the box.

Look repeatedly into the Palentire Stone after offing Marshgast.

Talk with Timmie a lot. Tell him his name.

Try to get different favors from Don Elrondo and the Elf Guard.

Comment on Pinhed's voice.

Have a long conversation with the Beastie.

Ask the Ninja Baker about his body odor.

Look at the left tusk o' the Dark Lord's tower.

Try to rumble.

Bugs

Don't be in Don Elrondo's quarters when night falls. Else you cannot move until the sun rises again.

There is an instance where it snows in De-Lorean.

Sometimes calling the hint line crashes the game. Always save your game before calling.

How To Complete The Quests

Each o' the games has a different goal and conclusion. This is where I spoil all the fun... so if you want to turn back now, do so...

Some Common Problems

Always get the donuts, defeat the Police Officer and the Gorgon, kill the High Steward and neutralize the Evil Wizard Marshgast. Always confront the Queen of De-Lorean, get the ice for the King of De-Lorean and re-vitalize the Elfis Golem.

The Good Old Traditional Quest (GOTQ)

The point o' the quest is to kill the dragon.

Never try to do this yourself — this will be taken care o' by some Mafia Elves. You have to get a contract on the dragon first ("Elven Gift Certificate").

It is a fun quest, but very frustrating as you end up rather stuck at several points o' the game, directionless and confused by various red herrings: Ignore the Spiders, the Ferryman / Pirate problem, King Afro's Palace as well as the Lift leading to the Dark Lord's Tower.

The game ends when you hand the gift certificate to the Elf Guard at Rivendull.

The Magnificent 7-11 Quest (M711Q)

The point is to gather seven to eleven companions.

O' course, the "to eleven" is just a pun — seven are enough (Mr. Tree, Humprey Balroh, Goliath, Conrad The Barbarian, Gingerbread Hero, Elfis Golem, Beastie).

There are some red herrings here, but not as many as in the GOTQ (no way o' defeating the Dark Lord): Ignore the Spiders, the Hairdresser and the Wig-Maker.

The game ends when you have recruited the seventh companion.

The Bizarre & Slightly Twisted Quest (B&STQ)

The point is to kill the Dark Lord. The whole "Lava Lamp" spiel in the introduction is somewhat misleading.

Not as difficult as the game designers want to make you believe, really...

There are less red herrings here: Ignore the Grail quest, the Flake Town Disco and the Costume Shop.

The game ends when you wear an asbestos suit and put a candle in the giant candle holder on Mount Boom.

Legalese (Refresher Course)

This document may be only freely distributed online, and on the following networks: Internet, FidoNet and America Online.